We believe we are the product of our past, which we are, but it does not have to define who we are today. Our subconscious mind is incredibly powerful. So, it is really easy to slip into the same mode of beliefs that we had before. However, if we give ourselves a moment to reflect & reason, our neo cortex which is the frontal lobe which houses our reasoning abilities, will take over. It needs to be a conscious choice otherwise the subconscious will simply replay the old tapes.
Here are some tools to help to move forward to a brighter future.
1. Face the Past
No matter how painful, once faced can be healed. Find a good practitioner if necessary to help you. The proverbial s… happens. But it’s over, it happened, & now you can change it.
Although you cannot change what happened, you can change the way your brain & body feel about what happened. The bad experiences or choices do not have to define you.
There is a saying “that without forgiveness, is like you drink the poison & expecti the other person to die”.
You can forgive without condoning the behaviour.
Forgiving ourselves is equally as hard, in fact often harder. Remind yourself you are human & humans make mistakes. That is how we learn. A mistake does not define us. In fact, it matures us, gives us humility, makes us human.
Look for the lesson in the experience. In fact, the gift. What quality have you developed because of this experience? How has it made you a better person?
How is your life richer because of this?
Dig deep if necessary…you will find the gift.
4. Let go of Being the Victim
Take a moment to reflect on how the pain, the experience, the reliving in your mind over & over again, benefits you.
Who would you be if you were no longer the victim?
How would you be different? What would you do differently? What stops you?
Now take a moment to be the opposite of the victim. What would that be for you?
5. Spend time in the Present.
Our actions, past pains, experiences have made us who we are today. The actions that we take today will define our future.
How would you like your future to look? Be conscious & present to this moment of your thoughts, beliefs, choices & actions, so that you become who you want to be, in the future.
To overcome past painful experiences feel free to call me to set up an appointment.