We believe we are the product of our past, which we are, but it does not have to define who we are today. Our subconscious mind is incredibly powerful. So, it is really easy to slip into the same mode of beliefs that we had before. However, if we give ourselves a moment to reflect & reason, our neo cortex which is the frontal lobe which houses our reasoning abilities, will take over. It needs to be a conscious choice otherwise the subconscious will simply replay the old tapes.
Here are some tools to help to move forward to a brighter future.

1. Face the Past

No matter how painful, once faced can be healed. Find a good practitioner if necessary to help you. The proverbial s… happens. But it’s over, it happened, & now you can change it.
Although you cannot change what happened, you can change the way your brain & body feel about what happened. The bad experiences or choices do not have to define you.

2. Forgiveness

There is a saying “that without forgiveness, is like you drink the poison & expecti the other person to die”.
You can forgive without condoning the behaviour.
Forgiving ourselves is equally as hard, in fact often harder. Remind yourself you are human & humans make mistakes. That is how we learn. A mistake does not define us. In fact, it matures us, gives us humility, makes us human.

3. Gift

Look for the lesson in the experience. In fact, the gift. What quality have you developed because of this experience? How has it made you a better person?
How is your life richer because of this?
Dig deep if necessary…you will find the gift.

4. Let go of Being the Victim

Take a moment to reflect on how the pain, the experience, the reliving in your mind over & over again, benefits you.
Who would you be if you were no longer the victim?
How would you be different? What would you do differently? What stops you?
Now take a moment to be the opposite of the victim. What would that be for you?

5. Spend time in the Present.

Our actions, past pains, experiences have made us who we are today. The actions that we take today will define our future.
How would you like your future to look? Be conscious & present to this moment of your thoughts, beliefs, choices & actions, so that you become who you want to be, in the future.

To overcome past painful experiences feel free to call me to set up an appointment.

Why is it that New Year’s resolution mostly don’t work?
We plan to lose weight, earn a certain amount of money, spend more time with our family, cut down on drinking, exercise more, and so on.
We resolve to do these inspiring things in our lives knowing that if we did them our lives would improve considerably.
All well & good, but unless we act, it is just a nice thought.

This is where goal setting comes into play. For goal setting to work it needs to be broken down into achievable bite size bits. Otherwise it just becomes lost in the busyness of our lives.

Here are some things to do to help achieve your goals & resolutions.

1. Visualise.

Spend some time alone just thinking about what it is you really want. Everything starts with an idea. See yourself achieving your dream. Get all your senses involved.
How will you feel once this has been achieved?
Once you feel excited about this dream it is time to take the next step.

2. Stepping Stones.

Set yourself mini deadlines. What do you need to achieve in a week, month, three months, six months?
What steps need to be put into place to achieve this?
Once achieved, how can you reward yourself?

3. Post it

Stick “post it” in strategic places, like the fridge, your computer, bathroom mirror, reminding yourself on what needs to be achieved each day.

4. List

Devise a system for yourself on what needs to be achieved each day in order of importance.
Mark them 1 – 2 – 3 or A –B – C
Work through the number ones or A first. Once those are ticked off move to number 2 or B & then onto three or C.

However, unless action is taken it is just a nice idea.

It really is useful to have a coach to help you to crystallise your ideas & to inspire you to reach your goals.

If you would like some help, call to make an appointment for a FREE goal setting session.

We are hard wired for fear. It keeps us safe. The amygdala part of our brain kicks in to get us to run for our lives or stand up & fight.
The problem is we often stay in that fight – flight – freeze mode.
Our thoughts imagine the worst & frighten the hell out of us. We believe these thoughts.
If we take a moment to realise it is simply our thoughts & because we have control over them (yes we do!!) – we can change them.

Here are five steps to take to help get you from fear to confidence.

1. Body Awareness

• Take a moment to get in touch with your body.
• Plant your feet firmly on the ground. Feel the earth beneath your feet strong & solid.
• Take a moment to feel where in your body you feel this fear.
• Notice if it has a shape, a colour, and size.
• Now take a moment to breathe into the fear.

2. Question your Thoughts

• Give your thoughts a voice.
• What are they saying to you? How are they trying to protect you?
• When you have these thoughts how does it make you feel?
• How would you be different without these thoughts?

3. Dance like Nobody is Watching

• Just imagine what it would be like to not have the fear. How would you think & feel?
• See yourself behaving in this confidant devil may care mode. Nobody is criticising or judging you. It is just you being your authentic self.

4. Fake it till you make it.

• Pretend this is really happening to you.
• Notice what happens in your body. Feel the lightness & confidence.
• Each time the fear comes remember this feeing & go back to it till you consistently resonate with this feeling.

5. Gratitude & Visualisation

• Every morning before you get out of bed, give yourself time to give gratitude for all the good things that are happening to you. Try to find new things to feel grateful for.
• Visualise your day the way you would like it to be seeing yourself being the new confidant you.

EFT is an extremely effective way to overcome fear.

Feel free to contact me to show you how quickly & easily you can attain this new found confidence that is sustainable.